Actor and performer Alyson Stoner, famously known for “Step Up” and “Camp Rock,” opened up about her experience with dangerous conversion therapy before coming out a pansexual. Stoner shared talked about her journey in an interview with Insider on Wednesday.
Alyson, who came out as pansexual in 2018, she sought gay conversion therapy as she struggled when she fell in love with a woman for the first time.
Stoner said, “I felt stuck. I felt wretched. I felt like everything was wrong with me, even though I, in my heart of hearts, only desired to be a devoted follower of God. So to hear from people you trust, from people you respect, from people you might even aspire to become, that you at your core are ‘rotten,’ ‘abominable,’ that the devil has a target on your back because of your position in Hollywood… it just sends you into a spiral, at least for me, because I just wanted to do the right thing.”
Alyson also stated that she tried to understand and empathize with pastors and their religious view points, which she said were a result of a specific “environment and time period.” Nonetheless, the Step Up star admitted that she is not so forgiving about the “therapy” itself.
The 27 years old actress and dancer stated that her experience with the therapy was “legitimately difficult to talk about. She said, “My mind doesn’t want to even go there. My legs started shaking at the thought of reliving some of it… I know firsthand how dangerous it is for me as someone who had access to therapy and other forms of support. And I still was considering whether my life was worth living or, if everything was wrong with me, then what good was it for me to be around, starting to see myself as someone who only brought harm to other people to society.”
Alyson stated that due to conversion therapy, one can feel more depressed and develop self-hate Spreading awareness about the impacts of the therapy, Alyson warned, “The dangers are measurable. They are measurable. Even if someone comes out of it on the other side and says, ‘Hey, no, I’m living a great life,’ there are scars there. There are shadows,” she said. “So yes, I’m not capable yet of going back and recounting specifics, which is an indicator of just how difficult that chapter was for me.”